Blips On My Radar

So as you know by now I sit in a cube that is surrounded by many other cubes. This set up lets you overhear a lot of things and also makes for some good observation. What works to my disadvantage is that I am the loudest laugher ever and usually when I get rolling people 6 rows down can hear me. It could be farther I just had a few buddies six rows down who actually told me they could hear me like I was sitting next to them.

Anyway this is a short blog about some of the stories I have heard or been told directly while at work.

The guy who sits across from me is also one of my husband's friends outside of work. So when things get irritating or slow we just chat to either pass the time or snap each other out of a funk. From here on out I will call him Cubemate. Now I am not sure how we got on this subject but Cubemate started telling me this story of when he was little a couple Mormans, no doubt on their mission, came knocking at his parents door. His mom instinctively told him and his sister to get under the dining room table so they wouldn't be seen in hopes the missionaries would go away and think no one was home. Cubemate and his sister AND his mom all sandwiched themselves under the kitchen table and waited. He told me that the knocking briefly stopped until they looked up and the two missionaries had gone around to the back of the house and were now staring at his family huddled together underneath the kitchen table. He said he remembered his mom whispering to them in a commanding tone, "DON'T MOVE!" all the while these two guys were pointing at them through the glass and repeatedly knocking on the door. He said they finally ended up leaving and no one in his family ever questioned the whole episode. But as he was telling this story to me you could see it was one of those stories when you tell someone out loud it sounds way more out there than originally interpreted. He said he brought it up to his mom awhile back and she chose to have a selective memory and wiped the whole incident from her mind.

Story two about Cubemate.
He made an appointment on Halloween night at a local salon to get his hair cut. When he arrived the stylist, a guy, escorted him back to his chair and got the low down on what he wanted done. Cubemate removed his glasses and the stylist went to work. I should mention that Cubemate cannot see his hand in front of his face without his glasses. Cubemate said he heard the scissors snapping but didn't quite feel the amount of hair falling off that he would have expected but figured he had been there almost 45 minutes so the stylist must be doing a good job. Plus since he couldn't see what was going on who was he to question. After 45 minutes had passed the stylist told him that he was finished and asked him to give it a look and see what he thought. Cubemate said that his hair was all styled into almost an updo and had so much gel in it that it was hard to tell what really happened. He casually told the stylist that it looked good and promptly put his hat on. The next day Cubemate woke up, got some coffee, and sat down on the couch. His wife walked in, took one look at his hair and asked him if he had gone to get a haircut yet because it still looked like was wearing 'the helmet'...sidenote.. Cubemates hair grows out on the sides and really starts to resemble a helmet. He said yeah he just went the night before. She told him that he got the 'Coming To America' haircut and to go take a look for himself. Cubemate went to the bathroom and indeed saw in full glory that no hair from his head had actually been removed. His neck was shaved but his hair was just as long as it had been the day before. The updo gel style totally masked the fact that very little, if any hair was cut off his head. It is a mystery what the stylist did for 45 minutes and now Cubemate is pissed that he dropped $30 to get his neck shaved.

Third and final story....
There is a lady at my work that is a little crazy. People are seriously scared of her and try to avoid her at all costs. She has in the past been known to threaten people if they mess with her and even has thrown out there that she would key people's car. So needless to say she is a loose cannon. A friend of mine who she works for said he overheard an interesting exchange the other day. Crazy was challenging a guy who had just returned from getting knee replacement surgery to a race. Apparently this guy was bragging how well he was healing and that he could virtually do anything. Crazy bet him that he couldn't beat her in a race. He said he could and before my friend knew what happening these two were running down the hall. Crazy trips and her wig goes flying. Classic. Guess the knee surgery paid off.